Jesus, Be Patient with Me!
The quickest way to spread news in a monastery is to tell someone not to tell anyone. It’s just human nature, and St. Benedict was under no illusion that monks were different from anybody else. After all, he knew only too well that monks were people too. So he ordered his monks not to engage in gossip or murmuring of any sort. Good luck on that one!
In Matthew 16 Jesus warned his disciples to tell no one about about his real identity. The cynic in me says it was a clever ploy, and it worked. In short order the disciples took the news of Jesus to the ends of the earth. But a lot happened between Matthew 16 and the commission to preach to everyone, and therein we see the patience that Jesus showered on his disciples.
The passage from Matthew 16 opens with this simple question that Jesus puts to the disciples. “Who do people say that I am?” Here Jesus sounds a bit like a politician concerned about the polls. Was Jesus insecure about his public image? Or did he simply want to satisfy his own curiosity? I can only speculate, but I would suggest that perhaps he meant the question to stir his disciples rather than to find out how his message was going over with the larger population.
The data that the disciples gave to Jesus was a little odd. Some said that Jesus was John the Baptist. Others thought he was Elijah or Jeremiah or one of the other prophets. These were ridiculous answers if they were meant literally, because Jews then and now — like Christians — do not believe in reincarnation. And so I interpret these answers as signs of a struggle over the identity of Jesus. Clearly many had concluded that Jesus was some sort of prophet in a long line of prophets — and a great one at that. But just as clearly some thought that Jesus brought a message from God, but he was neither God nor the Son of God. For them Jesus was an interesting fellow with a compelling message. But he had no claim on their hearts.
Not so for the disciples, as Peter’s testimony suggests. It had begun to dawn on them that Jesus had a claim on them, and they could never be the same after meeting him. They would be very different poeple over time, and in Matthew 16 we see evidence of that spark of understanding.
Perhaps Jesus asked for their silence at this stage because it’s one thing to confess the Lordship of Jesus, and quite another to let Jesus transform one’s life. Anyone who knows the gospel story can certainly see this distinction take flesh in the lives of the disciples. The disciples may have had an inkling of the real identity of Jesus, but that didn’t prevent them from running away on the eve of his passion. Nor did their post-resurrection behavior suggest that they were thoroughly convinced of who Jesus really was. But still they were curious.
St. Benedict set up his monastery as a place where monks might seek God. But much like the dog who chases a car but has no plans were he to actually catch it, so monks face the same dilemma. What do monks do when they unexpectedly find that their search for God gives a glimmer of success? Well, from my own experience I’ve come to realize that the search for God is more than a mattter of satisfying my curiosity. Far from it. The search for God is a lot like playing with fire. So when I do seem to snatch a fleeting glimpse of God working in my brothers, I know I cannot respond conventionally. It’s not a matter of calling a pollster to report that Jesus is the Son of God. It’s deeper than that. Like the disciples, I too have to let that insight percolate through and transform my life.
Any search for God requires patience and time — perhaps even a lifetime. But because we live in a culture that demands instant gratification, we’re inclined not to budget time for long-term projects. And so I tend to be one of those who is willing to give Jesus a day or two to do his work, and if nothing happens then I’m tempted to move on. But this is short-sighted, to point out the obvious. The encounter with Jesus needs to stretch out for a lifetime, and thankfully Jesus is willing to invest the time in us. That explains the patience that Jesus showed to his disciples — and to Peter in particular. And it explains the patience he shows to me. Heaven knows how I need him to be patient with me!
+On August 24th I spoke to a group of about fifty alumni of Saint John’s University, gathered in St. Louis Park, MN. The subject was our work with First-Generation college students at Saint John’s, and more particularly my own work with a project that has brought students from Immokalee, FL, to Saint John’s. Happily, this fall we now have six students from Immokalee, and it is gratifying to see them progress, both in age and wisdom.
+On August 25th we monks welcomed the 467 freshmen at Saint John’s to pray evening prayer with us. Following that, the students broke into smaller groups in order of meet with individual monks and learn something about our lives in the monastery.
+On August 26th I gave a day of reflection for people preparing for the Promise of Obedience in the Order of Malta. This took place in Evanston, IL.
+On August 28th — today — the new school year begins at Saint John’s University. Gone is the tranquility of summer, and in its place is a wonderful sense of energy.
+The images in today’s post show a spectacular retable and frontal of the Life of Christ and the Virgin, made in Castile in Spain, ca. 1396. It is housed in the Art Institute in Chicago.